Exodus 1-14

“God will fight the battle for you.
And you? You keep your mouths shut!””

This verse shows everything that I am lacking. Let me take a second and show what I am good at. I’m good at taking things for granted. I am good at complaining when things don’t go my way. I’m good at whinning when life gets hard. I’m good at not wanting to work for anything in my life (and yes I’m aware that the things worth anything are the very things you need to work the hardest at). And I am very good at having zero patients. I need everything I want and I want it all now.

” God will fight the battle for you.
And you? You keep your mouths shut!”

This verse is quite possible the hardest thing I have read in my journey so far. It is also probobly the biggest slap in the face. The past few months of done a lot of begging and pleading to God. I’ve thrown myself in to prayer and scripture. I’ve opened up about lies. I’ve stepped out of my comfort zone on many occasions, and what have I got to show for it all? A life of bitterness and frustration. A life where I’ve got nothing I’ve begged and pleaded for. I mean come on it’s been months now. I’ve done my part haven’t I God? I mean I’m talking to you. I’m reading your word. I’m going to church and what have I gotten in return? Nothing. I’m still here and you’ve done nothing.

But Greg, you haven’t let me. You haven’t given me the chance. You won’t shut up for 5 seconds to allow me to do my thing. And it may not be done they way you want it to but I’m telling you it will be better then you ever imagined. Just shut up.

And there it is. In one simple verse

” God will fight the battle for you.
And you? You keep your mouths shut!”

I’ve been exposed. I’ve been brought out of hinding and now have to come face to face with my greatest fear. GROWTH!

But how God. How do I change that about me. When everything feels like it’s crashing down, how do I let go and trust you? Give me something. Give me a sign to show me you got my back. That you are there. That your going to fight this battle for me.

What haven’t I given you Greg? Love? Security? Friendship? Myself? What more is there?

Growth…This really sucks!

-Truck

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One Response to “Exodus 1-14”

  1. I agree – growth is hard! It hurts and is a constant battle, especially trying to learn to have patience and just allow God to take over your life…praying for you bud!

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